YouTube Playlist

Sometimes it just happens, when you have a few select songs you can't stop listening to. So.

Nick Cave - Love Letter

Megadeth - Addicted to Chaos

Grinderman - Man in the Moon

Zakk Wylde -As Dead as Yesterday

Steve Von Till - Breathe

Acid Bath - The Bones of Baby Dolls

Blind Melon - Mouthful of Cavities

"They see you. They see everything you do."

[torrent.]

Fragility be damned; Alone I stand, strong.

I stand not for your smile, your heart, your love.

No, alone I stand, atop my molten-cool center,

Winding down after my heart bled torrents.

Created are these; Emotional, scarred track marks.

Dormant I've lain, hiding my festering addiction;

A passenger of dark, masquerading through the light,

Sun-scarred eyes refusing to see; Refuse the pattern.

Waiting out storms; Dry I stand, remote.

The fire warms, but the water beads, running.

Pouring down my soul's bullet-proofed window;

A stifling reminder of all that could have been.

Unquenched thirst; The longing, the anticipation.

Even with open windows, it's still nothing but drops;

Bolt by bolt, Chain by chain, break down the door,

Surrender the fears, the loathing; Cold rain stings.

Lightning breaks right; Tearing the night, shamed.

The storm seeps, the open wounds, painful reminders.

The rain I begged for and storm that I had sought;

These scars still bleed from your tainted touch.

No longer can I know, I'm conditioned beyond repair.

[ruin]

I am an engine of ruin; far too aware.

I cannot stop the engine; ruin is imminent.

I never said that I don't make mistakes.

The mirror reflects a truly snowy descent. 

Sadness/Madness/Ruin.

From/Reply II

From: Storm of Lies

Drying out --
After riding out the storm
The falling tides
Washed my hope ashore

Drawing lines in the sand
Waiting for the sun to set,
The waves to rise
And this smile
To be tested
By the stormy waters
Of a lifetime of past mistakes

The storm of lies --
Bleeding.
Torrent falls, the sirens ablaze
Standing silent amidst the embers.

Your hand,
Lone defender and sign
This war is over

Reply: Lines in the Sand

Control.

Like a subtle, lone whisper, this detail confines me,

Defining what I wish I could contain.

Contain; restrain; try to separate from.

Loss is an opiate, it numbs and it stings,

Luminous and dulling all the same.

 

These walls move closer, get slicker,

I can't say I have much to hold on to –

No matter how hard I wish, how hard

I cry, tape peels, posters crash.

These walls remain resistant to change,

Any change imposed  is  change denied.

Reality dictates gravity defies your logic,

Your hopes and your dreams.

 

Hope a neurotoxin, fueled by love – hate  –

Everything in between, but always a posion.

Always just enough to send everything you know,

Everything you've built – crashing down.

Lines in the sand are lines in the sand –

You a fool, always a fool for hoping they'd last,

Standing defiant to the crashing waves.

Reality dictates they wouldn't stay obedient,

But your reality always felt so far away,

A past tale to spill over coffee and a few laughs.

 

The war was never over –

This was just a temporary distraction;

Reality dictates that you ran away,

Chasing a trail of smoke and passion.

You ran away and left it all behind,

The war will always be here for you,

Just in time for your return,

Ready to pick up right where you left off—

Cold. Lonley. Far too aware.

From/Reply I

So, I'm thinking of doing a few before/after, from/reply pieces. These are old, are open thought/closed thought.

Initial:

Shadows on the Wall

Dancing shadows on the 
wall echo the storm in my
mind. A smile so bright and
phosphorescent brings out the
beautiful intensity from your
eyes.

I'd love to stay here, my fixed
gaze on your heavy, sleepy
eyes. If only I could I'd light your
world, into a towering, dancing
inferno, like these shadows on the
wall.

Reply: Narcissistic Delusionary Malfunction

1:4 

There is
no
light in
flourescent
minds;
only nar-
cissistic delusions

-----------------------------

I knew once
What made me.
The layers, eroded
by time lay crumbled.
You cannot define
what you do not --

Understand

Your smile ignited flame,
while the mind melted
my extinguishing infatuation.

------------------------------------

I've malfunctioned;
in a classical sense.
Lone aberration
lost at sea,
choked.. back by
a collective tide.

Absolution [dark]

Prelude: I think that I should explain that all of these short poems happen on a notepad while I'm at work. Due to the tiny size of the notebook, I limit myself to around 20 lines.

---

The clouds part -- unveil
A dimming sun, burning
The last of its waning life --
Slowly fading are pasty glories.
With each passing ray, atonement
Becomes all the more abstract --
A shimmering visage of the past.

The hands outstretch, crying out
In their own way, to the dimming sky;
"Fade not away -- we need you --
I need you. I need you now!" Ignorant
Are they to cry for absolution, ignorant
To the transitory stasis of an extinguished
Sky -- the cycle is light to dark, dark to light,
Before the final dark sky paints life black.